Listen To My Mother

This week, Shain and Sarah tackle their most X-rated listener submission yet. When a woman discovers that a man she met on a dating app has misrepresented a certain part of his anatomy, she goes through with their hookup anyway rather than risk embarrassing him. Her friend wants to know: Should she have let him get away with it?
The question opens up a candid (and often hilarious) conversation about sex, body image, honesty, and the complicated expectations surrounding women's sexuality. Sarah draws on her background in sex education and therapy to explore the difference between pursuing pleasure because we genuinely want to and having sex because we feel obligated to. Shain, meanwhile, questions whether today's culture of sexual freedom has created its own pressures, even as it challenges the expectations women grew up with in her generation.
Together, they consider what sexual empowerment actually means, why women can still struggle to advocate for themselves in intimate situations, and how deeply our relationships with our bodies are shaped by the expectations of others.
And in an unexpected turn, Shain shares the story of how she met Sarah's father in 1969, when two strangers on a motorcycle followed her home and she invited them upstairs. 😳
It's a funny, frank, and surprisingly tender conversation about desire, self-worth, the freedom to make our own choices, and the complicated ways we find connection.
A little heads-up: This episode includes explicit sexual language and frank discussions of sexual experiences. Probably not the one to play on speakerphone with the kids around!
Have a question you'd like answered on-air? Submit it anonymously through our Google Form:
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(Even though you sign in with your email address, we do not have access to it unless you choose to share it with us).
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This week, Shain and Sarah are joined by Sarah's siblings, Mara and David, to pick up a conversation that began in Episode 15: How can three children raised by the same parents have such different experiences of them?
Mara reflects on growing up with a younger version of Shain, while Sarah considers how their different personalities and circumstances shaped the relationships they each developed with their mother. David shares how being diagnosed with cancer at 18 changed the dynamics of their entire family—and especially his relationship with his father.
Together, the four of them explore how siblings can remember the same family differently, the ways parents change between children, and how much of who we become is shaped by what happened to us versus how we learned to respond to it. 
Their conversation also turns to a bigger question: Do we always need to unpack the difficult parts of our past, or can some things simply be left alone?
As Shain looks back on the mother she was and the relationships she now has with her three grown children, the conversation becomes a reflection on what parents pass down, what children carry forward, and what it means to understand each other more fully over time.
 
Have a question you'd like answered on-air? Submit it anonymously through our Google Form:
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfQpoAX6aWuI4B-Kjbf5SePSrhc3XyFtS-_v31Bvqos6wm6-g/viewform
All submissions are anonymous: even though you sign in with your email address, we do not have access to it unless you purposefully toggle on the option to share it.
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This week, Shain and Sarah respond to a listener who asks a question many adult children eventually face: How do you set boundaries with an aging parent who needs more emotional support than you have the capacity to give?
What begins as a conversation about boundaries quickly becomes something much larger. Drawing from their own experiences caring for aging parents, Shain reflects on the regrets she carries, the repair she longed for, and the compassion that only became possible with hindsight. Sarah explores what boundaries actually are—and aren't—and considers how adult children can care deeply for their parents without losing themselves in the process.
Together, they examine the complicated intersection of obligation, resentment, identity, and love. They ask what we owe the people who raised us, how our lifelong relationship with a parent shapes the way we care for them in old age, and, ultimately, who we want to be when someone we love needs more than we can give.
It's a thoughtful and deeply compassionate conversation about aging, family, and finding a way to care for both ourselves and the people who once cared for us.
Have a question you'd like answered on-air? Submit it anonymously through our Google Form:
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfQpoAX6aWuI4B-Kjbf5SePSrhc3XyFtS-_v31Bvqos6wm6-g/viewform
All submissions are anonymous: even though you sign in with your email address, we do not have access to it unless you purposefully toggle on the option to share it.
Follow us on Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/listentomymother

This week, Shain, Sarah, and Sarah’s sister Mara gather in Phoenix to discuss Heartwood by Amity Gaige—a novel that sparked a much larger conversation about mothers, daughters, and the stories we tell about our families.
What begins as a discussion of the book’s intertwined mother-daughter relationships quickly becomes a reflection on their own. Together, they explore how siblings can grow up with completely different experiences of the same parent, what children need most from the people who raise them, and the tension between accepting our parents as they are and longing for the parents we wish we'd had.
Along the way, Shain reflects on how her approach to motherhood changed over two decades and two daughters, while Sarah and Mara share their perspectives on growing up with the same mother at very different stages of life. Their conversation touches on attachment, expectations, repair, and the possibility of growth on both sides of the parent-child relationship.
It's an honest, funny, and deeply personal conversation about family, memory, and what it means to love imperfect people.
Have a question you'd like answered on-air? Submit it through our google form. All submissions are anonymous: even though you sign in with your email address, we do not have access to it unless you purposefully toggle on the option to share it.
And follow us on Instagram at @listentomymother !

Shain and Sarah start with a conversation about discernment counseling, which is a style of counseling used when couples can’t decide whether to stay married or separate. But as usual, the clinical conversation turns personal.
Shain reflects on her own marriage, the fights, the “f* you” that didn’t end it, and the decades it took to reclaim her voice. Sarah shares how a childhood of people coming and going shaped her attachment style and why abandonment doesn’t always look the way you think it does.
It’s an honest, funny, sometimes raw conversation about staying, leaving, invisibility, resilience, and the long road to feeling seen.
Have a question you want Shain and Sarah to answer on-air? Head to bit.ly/listentomysubmission and send it in.
All submissions are anonymous. Shain and Sarah want to hear what you’re navigating!
 
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In this episode, Shain and Sarah sit down for an honest conversation about grief, responsibility, boundaries, and the growing culture of estrangement. Shain shares the reality of losing a close friend and the unexpected emotional and logistical weight of serving as executor. Sarah reflects on her own season of change and shifting relationships.
Together, they explore big questions many modern families are facing: Are we too quick to walk away from relationships? Where’s the line between healthy boundaries and disposability? And what does kindness look like in a culture that makes disconnection easier than repair?
Do you have questions, submissions, or thoughts on today’s culture of estrangement? We'd love to hear from you at listentomymother.podcast@gmail.com
To have an anonymous question answered on-air, submit it at: bit.ly/listentomysubmission
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Shain opens up about her “soul friend” in the ICU and what it feels like to be the person everyone relies on in a crisis. With no listener submission this month, Sarah pulls out one of her keepsake journals and asks Shain a question straight from the page: “Were your parents religious when you were growing up?”
That single prompt leads to stories about Holocaust-survivor parents, Jewish identity, and the very different versions of “family dinner” they each grew up with. They wrap by reflecting on the best advice Shain ever received — and the advice she wishes she hadn’t. It’s tender, honest, and exactly the kind of conversation Sarah is grateful to have recorded.
Have a question you'd like answered on-air? Submit it at bit.ly/listentomysubmissionAnd follow us on Instagram at: https://www.instagram.com/listentomymother/

This week, Shain and Sarah respond to a listener who’s struggling to make peace with a career risk that didn’t go as planned—and the sting of comparing herself to friends earning four times her salary. They unpack what it means to redefine success when life doesn’t follow a straight line. Shain applauds the courage it takes to start over and Sarah explores how grief, growth, and comparison intertwine. Together, they offer grounded insight on how to honor the lessons, release the shame, and move forward with purpose.
Have a question you'd like answered on-air? Submit it at bit.ly/listentomysubmissionAnd follow us on Instagram at: @listentomymother

This week, Shain and Sarah tackle a listener’s question about a friend who seems to be drifting away. Is it just the natural pull of a new relationship, or something more concerning? 
For the first time, mother and daughter don’t quite see eye to eye—Shain doesn't hold back, while Sarah leans into the complexities of grief, boundaries, and what it means when friendships shift. Along the way, they share how to grieve the end of an era, how to stay connected without judgment, and what to do if a friend may be caught in an abusive or controlling relationship.
Have a question you'd like answered on-air? Submit it at bit.ly/listentomysubmissionAnd follow us on Instagram at: https://www.instagram.com/listentomymother/

In this week’s episode, Shain and Sarah dive into a listener’s heartfelt question, "What happens when attraction fades in a long-term marriage—even after repair?"
Shain shares her own story of decades of resentment, hurtful words, and disconnection as well as the surprising ways intimacy and trust eventually found their way back. Sarah brings the clinical lens, weaving in how the body remembers past trauma and what it takes to rewire safety, trust, and desire in partnership.
Together, they offer both the motherly wisdom and therapeutic insight that remind us it’s possible to hold past pain and present love at the same time. And sometimes, letting go takes time.
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Have a question you'd like answered on-air? Submit it at bit.ly/listentomysubmission
And follow us on Instagram at: https://www.instagram.com/listentomymother/